Tuesday, August 29, 2006


A side effect of pregnancy that people don’t necessarily tell you about is that getting into bed becomes a major engineering project with pillows. We recently had to buy another pillow, because we only had five, four of which were mine. For the first 30 weeks, I used three and The Husband got the other two, but last week I had to commandeer the fourth one. Frankly, he was lucky I let him keep the last one for himself. Because I am very uncomfortable.

If I lie on my back, I need all the pillows to prop me up sufficiently so that the baby doesn’t squish my lungs and suffocate me. And if I lie on either side, I need a pillow between my knees and one supporting my stomach so the baby doesn’t pull to one side and tear my stomach from my body. (Which probably wouldn’t happen, but Lord, it feels like it will.) Once I’m in a position I stay there, so I have to take advantage of every nighttime trip to the bathroom and use the opportunity to switch between positions. Thus, getting back into bed involves much rearranging of pillows and grunting until I finally get settled.

Fortunately, I am not as stupid at night as I am while unrolling rugs, and have not yet tried to sleep on my stomach.

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